~deep in thoughts~

i think this is karma. T_T totaly im crying from inside to outside. Dear God, only you can heal this wound. huhuhuhuhu.... man cannot be trusted~~ sometimes they r the apple of the eye, but sometimes they are the the one who will break ur heart into milion pieces. This year i got two broken hearts.

1st~~~ one who cares about the looks n not the heart!!! cannot accept this kind of situation. He told me he want me to slim down if not he will leave me!!what kind of person is that??? he's not that cute, not that handsome,not that tall, but still.. want to demand more???? hahhahha..man like that can go to hell! stay rotten in there!! let him be with those pretty n slim ladies. hahhaa... i want to see who will love him for who he am or just for what he can supply (moneyof cozzz) hahhahhahahhah... it's okay.. i got my own carrer,my own life to move on.

2nd~~ one who cares for his frend a lot better than his own girl. the question is,... will his beloved frend be there for him if he is in deep n imean very deep problem??? does his fren wash his laundy?? will his frend cook, be patience,and tolerate all his bad manners without feeling any disgust???

im so not into guys now. can i be back to my old self??? im trying to change to be a better person,but God I cannot handle any of this.

My only way to keep my head straight is to keep on pretending that i'm happy. Im sick n tired of pretending...but for the sake of life... i must try.

i'm crying a lot..i've cried all my life. when will hapiness be there to pick me up??? am i destinied to have a misrable n lonely life????

~~LIFE~~

isn't this beautiful???? what a splendid job that the Lord hath made!!! guess where i took this lovely pic?well, u've guess it.. It's the tip of Borneo!! Simpang mengayau. it is ssoooooooooooooooo beautiful!! cannot believe i've been there. well, actually it's my second trip to Kudat. but, that was a long2 dayssssssss agoooooooo.

MOre Pictures to come...

hobbies ♥

im so into music... hahhaha... but not singing anymore. im now tring to play the VIOLIN. yes... a VIOLIN. hahhahhaha.... some of u may think right now am I crazy or what. hahhaha.. but, for ur info, i happend to play the piano since i was 6 years old. well, i used to practice with this small casio keyboard. but, since it was being carried, and thanks to my brother's saliva (which is unstoppable drooling) the keyboard is now long gone. (sad.. sad...)
i used to love conducting a choir (hey, i do learn conducting, in a formal way). kadang² lutchu bangat tingu tangan orang yang conduct tp teda erti. hahhahahhahha (penjahat kan saya, mengijik). kcian juga la sa rasa bagi orang² tersebut.
opppssss... tersasar pla tajuk, best ba men violin. sekurang-kurangnya tidak juga penat tingu 4 not music bsusun. hahhahahha... ishk² tiba² thought blok pla. hihihi.. bye

feelings

ari ni tiba² pla ada mood mo mblog. it seems that I can't make my own decision. i just foloowed what people says and what people told me what to do. ishk.. tiada pendirian pla saya ni. ntah la... kadang² geram pla rasa bila kena buat mcm kita ini hanya menurut ja. tiak ka orang lain perhak fikir apa yang orang lain rasa. IT'S really UNFAIR!!!!!
saya malas da layan orang bagus² dan jaga hati orang sedang kan hati saya sepa yang jaga??? perasaan kita sendiri sepa yang jaga???
yang paling bikin benci lagi, when we start to love and trust that some one, tiba² pla gone with the wind, and singing a silence song. what the heck.. im sick and tired thinking about else, can I be selfish for just this time???
tp, mungkin saya memang diciptakan untuk jadi begini. sentiasa kisah n peduli apa perasaan orang. cepat lagi kasihan... aiya... i really want to turn BAD for some time.
hahhahahha.. the older i become, the more mature i can be. (hahhahahhahha.. im blogging all about my self) hehehhehehehehhehe
last sekali, sebenarnya, sa mo kempan ba ni.... mari kita jangan pkai beg plastik lagi klu p membeli di supermarket. hahahhahaha.. Go Green.. Save the environment. PEACE XD